What motivates You?

"Hey you, What you got here that's worth living for?" -Princess Bride.

I think about that a lot, more than ever lately. What motivates me to keep breathing each day? I know that sounds a little crazy, but for real, what keeps you going in life?

I continually struggle with this because I want something more out of life. Like a purpose. And not just any purpose, but one that's long-lasting, and fulfilling. But its hard at times to see what exactly my purpose is. And without a purpose you just derail. You start spiraling into a routine, walling up, or living the same boring thing over and over again till you feel like your stuck. Stuck in life, wondering when your day is going to come; wondering when things will get better. And wondering why the good moments never last.

I'm sort of in that place right now, trying hard to not fall into something normal. I can sort of see my calling, but its so fuzzy right now; and there are so many distractions. I work full-time, I go to school full-time. Most of my friends are too far away to hang out with. I work, sleep, eat, play video games, do school. And that's like all I do. I went to the bar the other night, and it was fun; but I've just been feeling stuck. Like there's nothing to do except work hard, do school, have some fun, and go to sleep.

I want more than that. Man I want to build communities. Video games are fun, school work is alright, work is fine. But where is my purpose? Is my purpose to play video games the rest of my life? To work the rest of my life? To achieve my degree and then what? I'm not dissing anything, but don't you ever feel like the normal way of things is sort of meaningless. Your slowly getting older and what are you doing with your life?

Bear with me, I know I'm complaining a little, but I'm also trying to get you thinking. There's more to life than this. 'We were meant to live for so much more...have we lost ourselves?' is a great question that Switchfoot asks. I've certainly lost myself before; fortunately I've found myself, but keeping myself in sight is hard! It would be so easy to just live the mediocre life. But I'd probably die from boredom.

I was talking with a co-worker the other day about retirement. I'm 23 and I'm already paying into a retirement fund, it feels really weird. I asked him if I should really pay into it, and he gave me a funny look and said of course I should. Told me what else would I do if I reached 62 and had no retirement fund? I kinda joked with him and told him that maybe I should aim to die at age 62. I have nothing against retirement funds, and I am continuing to pay into mine...but I mean seriously, if that's all I'm doing in life is trying to live long for myself, building up a retirement fund...I really should just aim to die at 62. There's no point in living with an attitude like that. Living for nothing is pointless.

So what are you living for? Its taken me a while, but I personally feel called to building communities with a Jesus focus, as I've mentioned. Ever since I discovered what community was like, I desire it for everyone. I wish I could make a giant family out of a town, you know. Having people care about each other and treating each other with respect, coming together. And drawing people to Jesus. Whats it I got that's worth living for? Its love, true love; love for people, desire to see them happy and fulfilled. Sometimes I just wish I could take all the crap and hurt and toss it out for a moment, and give the world a giant hug. I love people, I want to have God's heart for people too. There's a lot of hurt, abuse, misunderstanding, and loneliness in the world. And community can help people come together and be a catalyst for change, healing, bonding, and unity.

Can you imagine what our nation would look like if all the people were all giant close communities? We'd be a nation on steroids, an example to the world, and probably dealing with less of the bitterness and disunity that we see currently in the political parties.

I know I sort of rambled on; just my thoughts and all. If there's anything I really want you to take from all this its: 1. Don't live a normal life...there's so much more to life than entertainment and living alone. And 2. What are you living for? What keeps you going?

‎2 Corinthians 4:16-18